Mommy-Life: Wubbanub Love!

If you follow me on instagram then you know I gave in to the paci. I swore up and down when I was pregnant that I did not want RJ to use a pacifier. I swore up and down when he was first born that he would get nipple confusion and that he wouldn't know the difference and I'd never be able to breastfeed or my nipples would fall off (drama queen much?). ANYWHO, that all pretty much goes out the window when you have a screaming infant who isn't hungry trying to permanently attach themselves to you. So PACI IT IS!

Y'all know the pacifier struggle! You put it in their mouth... kid spits it out... it rolls under the couch somewhere into the unknown abyss of all things kids drop... I don't have time for that! So whoever invented the Wubbanub had me on their heart!

The Wubbanub is a cute little stuffed animal with a soothie type pacifier sewn onto it. It is machine washable (perfect for when 'Frogger' needed a spa day) which has me a little skeptical but we've only had to wash it once. Very very practical for moms who aren't into those pacifier clips and they are super stinkin' cute! The recommended age on the packaging is 0-6 months but RJ just turned 7 months and I'm not ready to fight that battle yet.



We always get compliments on how cute they are and he loves both versions that he has. They come in a HUGE variety of different animals. Get on it yall! Make those bebes happy!!! =)

*this is not a sponsored post... he just really loves that thing and I thought I'd share =)*

A Breastfeeding Mom's Inner Monologue....

Before Feeding....

"I wonder when he's gonna wake up..
he's been asleep for pretty long...
It's not time for him to wake up?
Hope he isn't hungry.
What if he doesn't know he's hungry?
God I hope he wakes up if he's hungry.
He has to be hungry my boobs feel like rocks.
Is that a lump? *feels boobs*. I hope that's a milk lump.
How would I ever know if I'm abnormally lumpy?
Gosh my boobs are full... "

During Feeding....

"At least I don't feel like my boobs are gonna explode anymore *sigh of relief*
Is he sleeping? Nope... Just taking a break.
He looks so peaceful... sweet baby.
OK kid... it's not playtime. Stop trying to look around with my boob still in your mouth.
OUCH! Why are baby gums so sharp?
You better hope you don't get teeth any time soon!
I have to pee.... I always have to pee *crosses legs*
Are you done?... No don't scream... Shhhh shhhhhh
Why is this taking so long? How big could his little stomach be?
Why was that so quick? He couldn't have eaten enough!
It's fine.. take your time..."

After Feeding....

"Phew! Finally! My arm was going numb!
Awwww! Look at the cute little sleeping face. #milkdrunk
Now if I could just lay him right........ CRAP... hes up!
I'm not re-latching you kid you aren't hungry.
You can't be hungry it's impossible!
Shhhhh SHHHHHHHH it's OK sleep baby!
Here you go... take the paci... shhhhhh
Why isn't it working?
Oh good he isn't crying anymore he's just staring at me wide-freakin-eyed!
*re-latches*
I'm gonna be housebound the rest of my life. "

*This post was intended for humor. I love breastfeeding and wouldn't trade that opportunity for anything at all! But we all have our moments and if you don't then pat your perfect self on the back and know that I DEFINITELY have mine! LOL*

No One is Good Enough [Mom Confessions]

I'm freakin' emotional! I was literally banned from watching the news my whole pregnancy cause I would cry to my boyfriend about any and everything! Postpartum the emotion hasn't gone away. And sensitivity has brought it's friend paranoia along for the ride! 

The news literally makes me feel like I may go crazy. Especially because something bad is always happening... somewhere... to someones child. Technically I guess everyone is someones child but I really mean babies. Yesterday I read about a man who shook his two year old stepdaughter to the point she was limp which cause irreversible brain damage. The little girl is now on life support and her family is preparing to take her off. 2 years old! And I've seen similar stories about family members harming/killing young children.

These are people that you least expect to harm your child. This woman trusted that man enough to marry him and to leave her daughter alone with him and he's taken away something he can never give back to her. In less than a minute anything can go south and I am terrified of leaving my child with anyone!! More so because I get. My baby is 3 weeks old and he is a SCREAMER. There's no crying lol.. He only has one volume. It takes about 30 seconds before I'm clenching my teeth myself so I understand how someone else could be frustrated hearing it. But it's never crossed my mind to shake him.. Or cover his face to stop the crying/decrease the noise... Or hit him out of annoyance. And these are all things you see via the news or social media.

 Do I have to go back to work?! There's gotta be another solution... Figuring it out...

Xoxo,

Tanay

Breastfeeding Chronicles [2 weeks Postpartum]

I figured I'd keep up with this breastfeeding journey since literally feeding consumes my life. All day there is a baby attached to me for some reason. I guess I don't mind though cause he's cute... And he doesn't have teeth yet. LOL. A little glimpse into what breastfeeding has been like for me for the first two weeks...

• The first week was the worst week of my life. He had a really poor latch at birth and when they tell you that a bad latch can lead to sore, cracked nipples... #jesustakethewheel... You don't ever want to experience that.

•  The lactation consultants at the hospital were crap. No one was able to help or explain to me how to get a GOOD latch. So the whole first week if it looked like he was eating I just didn't bother him. Big no-no. And I didn't see a good lactation consultant until his 1st checkup. 

•  Because we both (me and baby) had no idea what we were doing I ended up supplementing with formula for like... 2 days. I thought he had nipple confusion from using a pacifier.. Which I then blamed on everyone in my house because I didn't want him having it. And the latch got so bad that it was a fight late at night to feed him so I gave up. For 2 days I thought it was over for me feeding my baby. 

•  My right nipple split completely open during the second week. To the point where I worried that my baby would become a vampire cause it was bleeding slightly and I didn't want him to like the taste of blood more than the taste of breast milk. #dramaqueen 

•  But on a positive note it really does establish a different type of bond between you and the baby. Despite bleeding and the immense pain and the frustration during the first week .. I love the fact that I have something no one else can give my son. I love watching him and talking to him while I'm feeding him. I just love him. #obsessedmama

how could you not love feeding this little face?! lol #milkdrunk 

 

23 hours... 8 pushes... 0 stitches!!

On 10|23|14 (2 weeks and 5 days early) I gave birth to the most amazing little person I have ever met! Didn't I tell you guys he'd be an October baby? And at 2 weeks (and a day) old I am more in love than I have ever been!

Being a mommy is amazing and I'm truly loving every minute of it. People look at me like I'm absolutely crazy when they ask if I'm exhausted/tired and I say no. Cause I'm not. I don't feel like I'm truly sleeping any less than I was before. Chalk it up to my past insomnia. And I actually LOVE the moments we're up at night. He only wakes up twice during the night and I use that time (while breastfeeding) to kiss every little finger and toe... & stare at his big eyes.. & tell him my dreams for us. It's probably the only time I'm not sharing him so I soak up every minute of it. It also probably helps that he's such a good baby. He only cries when he's naked... which makes me wonder if he was switched at birth because in my heart of hearts I'm a nudist lmao.

All in all, I'm loving being a mommy. So to everyone who thought my excitement wouldn't last past pregnancy.... You were wrong *sticks tongue out*

Xoxo, Tanay

{BabyLove}- what's going on in 3rd tri?

Lemme just start off with a beautiful cliche disclaimer: Pregnancy is a beautiful thing. To know life is growing inside of you is amazing and I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world right now.

Now that that's out of the way.... I'll say it. I'm over it. I'm approaching 30 weeks in a couple days and I want this kid out (not really I want him to be as healthy as possible when he's born)!!! Who told me I could do this?! I'm not built for this! LOL. Pregnancy does so much to your body that NO amount of reading can prepare you for. Thank God for YouTube! If I didn't learn so much from there, my doctor would block my number from the amount of times I call her to make sure something is normal. 

I am now in the glorious third trimester of pregnancy where everything just seems to get bigger by the day. And by everything... I mean none of the important things that they tell you will get bigger. Like where are these great boobs I was supposed to get? Whomp! BabyLove is literally taking everything and I am ALL belly. I don't mind because I love him to pieces and I know he needs everything he can get but geesh... A little boob never hurt anyone! LMAO. Before pregnancy I was 100 pounds... At almost 29 weeks I was 121! Sounds like nothing to some people but when you're used to being THAT tiny all of your adult life... I feel like I'm doing a never ending gym workout. And don't get me started on breathing! I actually went to triage at the hospital two weeks ago because this baby is SO big and I am SO tiny that he's literally squishing my lungs and making it hard for me to catch my breath even laying down (I also can't get too full because then the pressure from my stomach PLUS baby take up too much space in there)! I was worried about the amount of oxygen he was getting but of course the little brat was fine in there! But breathing is an everyday struggle that I still sometimes panic about because I have a history of asthma and you never forget the feeling of not being able to catch your breath. 

All in all though OTHER than not being able to breathe and wondering where my boobs are.. I'm thankful to God that I've had an easy pregnancy. I have nothing to complain about (though hormones always help me find something) and I'm just anxiously awaiting the little prince's arrival and mentally preparing for motherhood. 

Life huh? 

Midweek Inspiration + A Letter to my Son

via Google Images

My sweet baby,

I can't believe you're almost here! I've carried you for 25 weeks and a few days now which means I'll get to see you in about 3 months. You're due November 10th but I have a feeling you'll be an October baby (I want to call it intuition.. though it could just be my anxiousness to meet you) and I can't wait until you're here and we can start this next phase of life together. You have already helped me grow so much as a person and I know our experience will make me that much better; of this I am determined. 

There isn't an hour that goes by that I don't think about you or wonder how you're doing in there. You probably know this already cause I'm constantly wiggling you around to make sure you're ok. That's my job as your mommy. To make sure that you are always safe. I already wish I could keep you protected from this crazy world forever....tuck you away somewhere... but that wouldn't be fair to you. Life's experiences are what's going to make you and sometimes it's going to be hard, but I'm always going to be here to motivate you, to wipe your tears, and to make it a little easier. I pray everyday that I can fill your childhood with happy memories and that you don't feel the stress or worries of adult life much too soon. 

You're going to be spoiled.There's no doubt in my mind. So many people love you already and it's amazing to be surrounded by such supportive people. Family is important and I hope you always keep that in the forefront of your mind. No one will love you as much as we do. Your mommy, daddy, grandparents, aunts and uncles... we all can't wait to see you and watch you grow up. It's almost like you're every one's first baby. Family also isn't perfect but I hope that you always remember that while you may have differences, God doesn't make mistakes and your family is yours forever. They are a little cray cray..... but you'll love them just the same. 

I have such high hopes for you. I hope you'll be a mommas boy (your daddy's hoping otherwise). I hope you have your daddy's passion and his drive because when he feels strongly about something nothing stands in his way. I hope you don't get either of our stubbornness but that's definitely wishful thinking!! LOL. But mostly I hope you never feel cheated or short of our love. You couldn't even begin to imagine how much you are wanted, anticipated and loved already. 

Xoxo, 

Mommy

#TrueLife: I have a big (but not really big) family

I am getting an instant migraine just thinking about it. With only about 17 weeks (God I hope!) until BabyLove is here, things are starting to move super fast. Naturally, people keep asking about the words I'm beginning to dread hearing. I feel like if one more person asks me about a baby shower I'm going to burst into tears at this point. 

And you would think this onslaught of waterworks would be due to the fact that I'm not going to have one. But nope, the problem is everyone wants to have one, and everyone wants to do their own thing. "Too many Chiefs and not enough Indians" in my dad's words LOL. Logic for me says one baby shower. Even though my boyfriend and I are not married, both his and my family are our son's family. I don't view my baby as having separate families. In my head when I think about my family I don't separate them by where they are or which parent they came from they're all my family. 

And getting some people to understand that logic for some reason just isn't happening. I live with my grandmother, my mother lives with her husband, my dad lives separately also... that's 3 different "families" on my side alone and that doesn't even include my boyfriends side. I just don't think it's logical to want separation because that's definitely not how the baby is going to grow up. 

I hate hurting people's feelings but we all need to get it together, or someone is going to lose out. And it won't be me of course because well... he's mine! LOL.

xoxo,

Tanay

Happy Birthday America!!

Happy 4th everyone from me and Babylove!! Be safe, have fun & save me a plate!! 

Be back Sunday for Sunday Social :)

Xoxo, 

Tanay 

BabyLove: Anatomy Scan

I cannot believe that by the time Monday comes I will be halfway done with this pregnancy! It sucks that I started a new blog so late because now you guys only get to hear about it halfway but I had a fairly uneventful pregnancy either way. I had started doing bumpdates on my old blog but my bump at the time didn't seem like it was changing that much and neither were my symptoms.. so it felt kind of redundant.

Anywho, I had my anatomy scan today and I was super anxious/excited for it all day! I'm happy to report (praise God) that the doctor said everything looks amazing and the baby is beautiful! =). He does weigh a pound already which from looking at my "What to Expect" app seems like its huge because they have the average weight as half a pound. I keep thinking about how the heck I'm supposed to push him out if hes almost 10 pounds by the time this is over because I was 5'1 and like 100 pounds when this all began so suuuuper tiny! I'm just happy that he's healthy and all is looking amazing!

If you follow me on Instagram then you've seen that I posted a picture up of him already but I'm going to re-share it anyway. And a few more. This may be the only time I get 3d pictures of him also so I was HYPE about that! haha.

She tried to get him to move his hands for like 5 minutes but he was NOT having it. He's also a very active baby so it took about 45 minutes for her to make sure she got all the measurements she needed cause he kept moving away from the ultrasound wand! LOL. Either way I still love his pictures and think he looks adorable! Mothers love? Lol. 

xoxo,

Tanay